Thursday, April 12, 2018

Oh, hi.

I’ve decided to throw myself back into blogging after a tumultuous couple of years of starts and stops.

I guess the best place to begin again is to start with where and why I dropped off the map.

In April of 2016, as I wrote about previously, my beloved pug, who I wrote about on several occasions on TLD, passed away suddenly. I felt her loss acutely; my grief was complicated and I spent a lot of time suppressing my pain just so I could make it through my workdays. Yes, my suppressed grief came back to haunt me. More on that later.

Shortly after my pug died, we were presented with the opportunities, by sheer happenstance, to adopt first one pug-mix (a then two-year-old boy) and a month later another pug-mix (a girl). Even in our pain, we found the strength to open our hearts to two little souls who needed a second chance.

During the summer of 2016, after months of suppressing my grief and throwing myself into my work, I experienced a serious medical deterioration that forced me to reevaluate my health, my emotional well-being, and seek the advice of specialists. Even after the catastrophic presidential elections in 2016, I still managed to, slowly-but-surely, piece myself back together and start posting on The Lexicon Devil again. Sure, my reading had slowed-down considerably, but I was reading. I was trying. I was healing.

Then, in April of 2017, the little pug-mix girl we adopted eleven months, who had been medically frail since she joined our family, was diagnosed with diabetic ketoacidosis that didn’t respond to treatment. After many hospital stays, and a tremendous fight to save her life, in May we had to say goodbye to our second little fur girl in thirteen months. To lose one companion in a year is difficult enough, to lose a second-- so close to the anniversary of your first loss-- is unimaginably difficult.

To complicate matters, in the days after losing our second little girl, I was party to a falling out with one side of my relations (for a number of reasons, none of which I get into) and, as a result, we are no longer in contact. As hurtful as this estrangement has been, it has paled in comparison to the loss of my fur-girls. All of our lives are better without having the other set of relations in our lives.

In October 2017, we adopted a little doxie-chi mix boy we met at an adoption event at a local pet store. He’s been a wonderful addition to our family after so much loss. He’s two years old and as characterful as an episode of Monty Python. Along with his big brother (who will be four later this month!), he has been our saving grace during these troubled times.

Twice last year my mother had to have major surgery (once at the beginning of the year and once at the end of the year). With her second surgery, in December 2017, she experienced major complications that prolonged her recovery period and caused a great deal of physical and emotional pain for quite a while.

Despite the onslaught of tragedies that befell our family over the past two years, recent months have been far kinder to us. My mother, after great hardship, has secured her dream job. I, against all odds, met someone very, very special.

Since we (as a family-duo) are in a better place, I felt like it was about time to reclaim my digital space and write about what I love . . . books and words and whatnots.

So, if all goes to plan, you’ll be seeing more of me around here.

Knock on wood.

No comments: